2001-03-27
Tonight's Soundtrack: Sean lennon
Tonight's Nailcolor: Pink
The Mood: Wired for sound
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My life is so crazy right now, really crazy like UNi and Work and Mr X/ But you know what I'm not going to let it bring me down. I'm just floating through, and it's quite alright.
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The trees are out of bloom and I'm running out of time
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My dad is so crazy right now, he used to be this really peppy positive guy, but he's ;let work just grind him into stone. he's all cold one minute then really pissed off another. he's never been like this. You know when you watch a movie and people say it's killing his soul. Well right now I can see my dads soul dying little by little each day.
he used to have this saying that was "ILLiagtamate Carberundum " which meant "Don't Let the Bastards Wear you down". Well they've gotten him donw alright, further than we ever thought possible.
My dad this really stong positive man whoc ould always make me laugh has become bitter, and really jaded. he doesn't trust people anymore. He told me yesterday that "Megan you can only realy on yourself" sometimes I think that, but it's not true. People are there for each other.
Myabe this all scares me so much because dad has become like the rest of us. He was my childhood fantasy, of reality, and his new self is a true representation of reality,.
Now I have nothing to shield my eyes from the harsh glare
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