2002-04-01
"You just have to deal with the choice you've made, you'll just have to deal before it goes away, you asked me how I feel here's what I say "I'm doing fine, just fine, I'm doing fine" - Mirah
The planets are definatly out of alignment this Easter Weekend, the full moon maybe has something to do with this, I'm not sure, but I am sure about some pretty goddamn crazy occurances in the world.
A weekend full of friends, rain and wine and amaretto and cuddles and realising just how important they are, and always will be... things said between lovers perhaps lovers no more, (on many accounts), my brother having a car accident, friends getting married, aunts handing over cash, people coming out of the woodwork.
and perhaps more personally startling, The news of something that I have wanted to hear since I was 15 but never once entertained the notion of realising.
and it will not be realised for the wide implications that the romance would have on, well everything and everyone... and you know what. thats okay.
and I am okay. Really, I am doing pretty good.
Mirah made men shiver this afternoon, eating chocolate and hearing something so good.
oooohhh oooooh, and in all it's imperfection things are crazy and crazily perfect. really, this is good for us.
it is. this is how lives are made. by being lived. BY DOING IT!
and if you stop it'll be over before you remember how you wanted to do it, what it felt like to make it real.
(I just saw my brothers car and him shaking in it. He is lucky that he wasn't severed by metal, he is even luckier that the girls he had in backseat are still alive. hot crushed mangled metal and that smell.... )
"We are tired of this business, from now on you break your own heart"Softer (no I don't really belive it, but I do it, I break my own fucking heart everyday.. but in good ways... ) .