__________________

"The longest distance in the world isn't the distance of life and death, it's not people seperated beyond the ocean, it is the fact that I am standing infront of you but you don't know I love you"

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This weird feeling is creeping over me and filling my veins, I think I am weirded out, complety taken aback by this state am in.

I turn 18 tomorrow.

There is a certain deal of joy in this as here in Australia you can legally drink and legally get into clubs/pubs and gigs.

There is also a certain deal of sadness for me, it's the eve of my 18th birthday, after midnight tonight my world changes forever.

I will become an adult.

I will be held responsible for my actions and the ill fated actions of beings in my world.

But I will not become a hypocrite or a liar, Thom York (radiohead) says that to become an adult is to become a hypocrite and a liar.

In this case I hope to stay a child for eternity.

I guess it's a long time since I have been a child, a child being an entity that is unaware of it's actions, the affect of these actions and the state of the universe it lives it.

I have always been aware of my universe, but now I can look on the shiny pop granduaer without dirt in my eyes, I think that makes me somewhat lucky.

I was reading my friend Marthas art major she is finishing year 12 this year, and she had this really beautiful saying, I cried it was so special.

"Sell flashlights in the void"

I feel so lucky, so scared and so right tonight.

I hope this is what is feels like to become an adult.

the then the now